I wish I had a dollar for every time I spent a dollar, because then, Yahoo!, I'd have all my money back.
Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.
To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
Allen: What are you doing Saturday night? Woman: Committing suicide. Allen: What about Friday night?
I think crime pays. The hours are good, you meet a lot of interesting people, you travel a lot.
Knowledge is measured by degrees of ignorance.
I am not yet young enough to know everything.
There are never failures -- only gained experience, wisdom, knowledge and lessons in life
.. I'm not racist, I've got a black president ...
It's as realistic as a cotton-wool tiger riding a tractor through a teardrop.